IF MEN REALLY RULED THE WORLD

Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number.

Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to "I love you".

Hallmark would make "Sorry what was your name again?" cards.

When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out.

Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack on the ass and a "Nice try, you'll get em next time". would pretty much do it.

Each year your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the football/cricket team of your choice.

"Sorry I'm late, but I got really wasted last night" would be an acceptable excuse for tardiness.

Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the "public ugliness ordinance".

Tanks would be far easier to rent.

Garbage would take itself out.

Instead of beer belly, you'd get beer biceps.

Instead of an expensive engagement ring you could present your wife to be with a giant foam hand that said "You're number 1!".

Valentine's day would be moved to Feb 29th so it would only occur in leap years.

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